Reliving a nightmare; In the wake of scandal

     Mike Huckabee's recent words angers me a great deal. Right now I positively hate that odious man, I find him loathsome and repulsive. I'm seriously angry at what he said in response to Josh Duggar raping five girls, in the now public wide scandal.

     In this case where we actually know that Josh Duggar undeniably sexually assaulted/raped five girls- Mike Huckabee dismissed it as a mistake and with all the seriousness of a typographical error. Even though this abuse scandal has been pushed into the public eye where it cannot be denied; Huckabee and others of Conservative, Evangelical, and Christian fundamentalist bearing still refuse to acknowledge it. And they do so by their treatment of it.

      Hearing Huckabee's words was like re-living all of the times I was dismissed regarding my own abuse experiences, even when I needed help. It was like reliving all the times of screaming on the inside or feeling like I was screaming and pounding my fists against those who were intentionally blind and deaf to even the highest amount of noise I could muster. And while they ignored my abusers slipped off into the shadows. My abusers got away with everything, no consequences. I would never be believed. And here even in a situation with evidence it seems the abusers still get away. It also seems that Josh Duggar's victims are treated as if they don't deserve the same amount of consideration as their rapist.

    "But of course everyone knows that women and girls are just emotional creatures anyway, I mean how much more of a victim could they be- this is how they react to everything right!?
And Josh Duggar is a Godly man who's character is being horribly publicly maligned. Poor thing he didn't have a chance, he was already a victim before this rape scandal (5 girls). And these girls were probably out to get him and more than likely used dark arts to seduce him. Poor, poor Josh. He was a victim the moment he was born, as are many such Godly men who must face a warped world of bitter women and a secular culture who wants to tear them down and destroy family values. From the moment he was born he would have been assaulted with this force of evil and made to face it head on."

     This sounds like it is only my over the top imaginative, sarcastic dramatization. But you would never believe how much of that is actually what Evangelical, Fundamentalists and those who belong to Quiverfull actually believe in some form or another (or maybe you would).
Those type of beliefs are founded on that singular moment in the garden of Eden when man was first victimized by a dark conniving force; a woman. This belief system has taken shape post Eden in a way that favors men and disenfranchises and marginalizes women. In the Pre-fallout Eden there seems to be evidence of the very controversial equal partnership plan. Saying these belief's are set up to favor men might seem a broad statement to make and therefore difficult to defend. However I ask you to consider the following: What if Josh Duggar was a woman who raped 5 younger girls?

     Would Mike Huckabee be rushing to make a statement of support? Would he say that J. Duggar, a woman of God simply made mistakes in the past? Would he still feel compelled when he is no longer defending a fellow member of the Godly bro-club? Could a Godly woman be so quickly forgiven for pasts mistakes, especially because it was before she truly knew Christ? I would base my hypothetical answer to that by asking for starters- when has womankind ever been forgiven by Godly men for their original mistake- the one involving an apple? It's potentially likely that the brilliant minds of those such as Huckabee would resort to calling out the state of J. Duggar's mental health- were he a woman in this scenario. They would point to hormones in some way, insanity and anything that fits with their image of the weaker sex. It's also a high probability that they would turn to their favorite stand by theories about the deviousness of women's sexuality.

     I have PTSD from having to relive the sickening corrupt politics, and facets of the Christian belief system. One that sometimes seems to let those who cause damage walk away free. One that often will interpret scripture however they see fit, and one that often disregards women as equal, competent human beings. I have my concerns about the founding principles for the entire religion that I was brought up with- but for today when I say Christian belief system I am focusing on those unhealthy facets that tend to be rigid, extreme and are essentially fundamentalist.

    Mike Huckabee's wording brought to life the pain and torment  I  had felt at being trapped in a system that refused to hear me, refused to acknowledge me. I was simply an obstinate, outspoken woman who was flooded with hormones and reduced in my ability to reason logically or tell the truth. Even when I as metaphorically pounding on the door, in need of help and had wolves nipping at my heels I was not acknowledged. In such cases you might be "dealt with" but your abusers won't. If it is true that the Duggar's not only hid the rapes to protect Josh but also to out wait the statute of limitations it makes me fell ill and incredibly heart sick. And despite everything we now know; I see many supposedly spiritual people  defending them, and defending a rapist- Josh Duggar.

     While coping with the injustices of my own experiences, my own abuse, sexually, spiritually and otherwise I always look to other similar circumstances to feel hope. I think to myself that maybe even though I did not find justice some other victim can. Then it feels in a way that I have found justice too. So it is incredibly saddening to watch this current scandal in all its unjust horror being played out. To say that life is not fair or that there are bad people out there does not even begin to cut it when an explanation for such atrocities is not only needed, but deserved.

And Mike Huckabee can go stick it where the sun doesn't shine.